"Lo! the poor topper whose untutor'd sense,
Sees bliss in ale, and can with wine dispense;
Whose head proud fancy never taught to steer,
Beyond the muddy ecstasies of beer."

George Crabbe

"Oh I have been to Ludlow fair
And left my necktie God knows where,
And carried half way home, or near,
Pints and quarts of Ludlow beer:
Then the world seemed none so bad,
And I myself a sterling lad;
And down in lovely muck I've lain,
Happy — till I woke up again."

A.E. Housman

"Give an Irishman lager for a month and he's a dead man. An Irishman's stomach is lined with copper, and the beer corrodes it. But whiskey polishes the copper and is the saving of him."

Mark Twain

"You foam within our glasses, you lusty golden brew, whoever imbibes takes fire from you. The young and the old sing your praises; here's to beer, here's to cheer, here's to beer."

A toast in The Bartered Bride, Bedrich Smetana's 1866 opera

"If all be true that I do think,
There are five reasons we should drink:
Good beer — a friend — or being dry —
Or lest we should be by and by —
Or any other reason why."

Henry Aldrich

"I don't drink water, fish f--- in it."

Oscar Wilde

"Being half drunk is just another way of saying you're almost there."

Jarrod Conway, Brisbane, Australia

"Now son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for Daddies, and kids with fake IDs."

Homer Simpson

"We're making the world a better place to drink, one beer at a time."

Joe Gural

"Cold War bad. Cold beer good."


"In wine there is wisdom. In beer there is strength. In water there is bacteria."


"I don't have a drinking problem so much as I have a drinking solution."


"The blood is now running through my alcohol stream."


"Some people see the glass half empty. Some people see the glass half full. I say it's beer man, just drink it!"


"There's nothing like a cold beer on a hot Christmas morning."

Homer Simpson

"Why is it that when you drink seven nights a week in college you are a partier, and after that you are an alcoholic?"


"Beer is good; drink it."


"There are many good reasons for drinking. One has just entered my head: if a man doesn't drink when he's living, how the hell can he drink when he's dead?"


"A wise man once said 'Never mix beer and hard liquor … unless you've only got one glass.' "


"There are those who drink and those who pound, and those who don't are bound to frown."


"No matter what you say or what you do, always cheer your frosty brew!"


"My advice to you is to start drinking, heavily."

John Belushi in Animal House

"Beer is the fountain of happiness
we should not question it's power
but blindly frolic in its foamy ways."

A drinking song, William Butler Yeats

"Trinken ist nicht die Antwort, aber beim Trinken vergisst man die Frage."
("Drinking is not the answer, but by drinking, you forget the question.")

German saying (?)

"The only thing worse than having to wait for a Bud is not having to wait for a Bud"

Geoff Ambrose

"If ya cant see through it dont drink it !"

Sloppy (Neil), a visitor to our site

"I distrust camels and anyone else who can go a week without drinking."

Joe E. Lewis

"Beer is yummy
In my tummy
I like beer
It's good gear"

Cameron Joyce

"What'd you like Normie?"

Sam, Cheers

"A reason to live. Give me another beer."


"What'll you have Normie?"

Sam, Cheers

"Well, I'm in a gambling mood Sammy. I'll take a glass of whatever comes out of that tap."


"Looks like beer, Norm."

"Call me Mister Lucky."

"Hey, Mr Peterson, there's a cold one waiting for you."

Woody, Cheers

"I know. If she calls, I'm not here."


"Beer, Norm?"

Sam, Cheers

"Have I gotten that predictable? Good."


"What's the story Norm?"

Sam, Cheers

"Boy meets beer, boy drinks beer, boy meets another beer."


"Can I pour you a beer, Mr Peterson?"

Woody, Cheers

"A little early isn't it, Woody?"


"For a beer?"

"No, for stupid questions."

"If you haven't got at least 12 different beers in your fridge, well, it's just not a beer fridge, is it?"

Wade Routledge, Fremantle, Australia, 2001

"The other day I was so desperate for a beer, I snuck into the football stadium and ate the dirt under the bleachers."

Homer Simpson, The Simpsons

"Thanks for coming to my party. Wow, you brought a whole beer keg!

Homer Simpson, The Simpsons

"Yeah. Where can I fill it up?"

Barney in reply

"If you can't drink tomorrow night, there is no reason to drink slow tonight!"


"If beer is liquid bread, then Guinness is liquid cake."

Naveen Kumar

"I find that if I drive slower, we use less petrol, the money we save can go into beer and the whole trip will be more pleasant."

"Clackers" Clarke, on a bush track to the opal fields at Mintabie, South Australia.

"There is an excuse for drinking light beer — sometimes — but there's never an excuse for drinking shit beer."

Geoff Ambrose

"Beer speaks. People mumble."


"The liver is evil. It must be punished."


"And Friday was Pay Day, and along with it came beer."

Rudyard Kippling

"Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water."

W.C. Fields

"'I'll stick with gin. Champagne is just ginger ale that knows somebody."

Hawkeye, M*A*S*H

"I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered."

George Best, late soccer player

"Milk is for babies. Real men drink beer."

Arnold Schwarzenegger

"I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex and rich food. He was healthy, right up to the day he killed himself"

Johnny Carson

"A man who drinks only water has a secret to hide from his fellow man."

Charles Baudelaire, French poet

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